eulogy for marcel brand
10.3.65 - 25.1.09

in 'the work of mourning' the french philospher jacques derrida warns us against the egocentric act of speaking about ourselves in a eulogy, but i ask you to indulge me for one minute. i have had to ask for my words to be read at marcel's funeral because i am too far away to be able to say them myself, and to say them to those of you that are here to mourn together, indivudually, whilst looking you in the eye, so that you may see the tears in my eyes and feel the warmth of my hand, so that you may see and feel and know that i too mourn with you, and that there are others on the other side of the world that mourn marcel's death, and that we remember him.

cue : idlewild - the bronze medal (from 100 windows)

the function of a eulogy is to address the living, not the dead. the dead are now, sadly, unable to hear us - and one of the reasons why we mourn is for all the things we would have liked to say to them which we did not, and which we now feel unable to say, which we will never be able to say to them. nevertheless i think we can say them and there is value in saying them, but for ourselves, since they cannot be heard by the person for which they are intended. for the speaker there is as much value in being able to speak, as there is in being able to be heard. i cannot hear these words being spoken but i need to say them :

it strikes me again and again that death draws those that are left behind closer together. rifts are healed, disagreements forgotten and perhaps ultimately, although i am not there yet myself at the time of writing, we can forgive those who have died as, aching with their absence, we comfort each other.

we need now to concentrate on the living, especially the young ones for whom this is an even more confusing and sad time than it is for us, and who will be scarred by this even more deeply. we must love them and protect them and nurture them through this and help them heal those scars. this is our duty now.

and as we look after the young ones, we are also nurtured by them and we are delighted by life - and i am so very sorry that marcel himself felt, in the end, unable to do so.

so goodbye my friend. i will miss you. i will miss your songs. your voice. your guitar. but above all, you as the erratic romantic idealistic fucker that you were.

and there are many here who will also. more than you may have thought.

so let us say the things we want to say to those still living.
let's say them now.
tomorrow it may be too late.

maybe now i know what this song means :

cue : club diana - let tomorrow be today (from match)

but now i am going to dry my tears :
there is work to be done.
even more so now.

dank u voor uw aandacht.

i.j.oog
wagga wagga australia
january 30, 2009.